Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
