Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
