he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
