they need to just BURY HIM!
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
