I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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