Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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