i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
