So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
