So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
