lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
