I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
