Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
