It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
