Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i would one night stand the shit outta him
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
