I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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