David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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