I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize