I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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