is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Randomize
