you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
