dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
