He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
