how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I'm at about main and main street
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
