ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Randomize
