We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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