no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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