why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
