I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize