All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
