just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
