Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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