Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
