the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
