I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Randomize
