Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
