we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize