im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize