I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
