those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
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