whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
