Someone shit on the floor
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
