Buhtt sex?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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