Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
