So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
