just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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