I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
