So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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