Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Randomize
