Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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