3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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